Ruth’s Chris – Enough of This
Great to get with the fine fellas of Chicago again and hit an historic spot when it came to Steak Night lore and was good to see this night was no different. Judging from the picture above, though, clearly this place has taken some measures to make sure every diner looks their best when getting insulted or tossed from a group dinner. I mean, what good is it if you can’t wear a stylish cap that may or may not be covering up some shame underneath? Local jerseys only on game day? Huh? Is this Chicago or Indianapolis?
That all said, reading this sign upon entering the establishment got the group fired up and ready for battle. Props to a few members who arrived quite early and ready to go with Steverino the bartender dishing out the most honest of pours for about an hour and a half prior to dinner. As usual with places in the area, the bar felt largely touristy and a little lacking on the overall atmosphere of a happening restaurant.
We got seated at our table near the restroom and proceeded to meet our waiter and his staff (or lack there of) who sure was aiming to please but likely to come up short at some point. Dude was about 5’6″. Heard about some specials we all didn’t want, got the cocktail orders and wine in and settled on a group portion of spicy lobster, calamari, osso buco ravioli and barbecued shrimp. Curiously, much like the sign out front, Ruth and Chris are not taking shit from anyone and therefore weren’t adjusting portion sizes. 5 Raviolis in the order only means 5 come out, don’t even bother of asking for an extra because you might throw off their company earnings. Same went for the lobster which either was too small in portion size for the group or taken down largely by one member of our dining crew, as that didn’t make it all the way around either. Calamari was good, and the shrimp was, well, shrimp.
Upon putting our steak orders in, we got a nice rendition of the complete order from the waiter, which nobody paid attention to, and off he went again to the playground to grab some more loose balls. Intermittently his staff would come over and splash some water around but it was nothing really to write home about here from a service standpoint. Steaks came out sizzling (as you see in the commercial) and on plates hotter than a damn forest fire. Cutting into our steaks, some of them looked amazing and others up to snuff, so none were sent back and the meat review from all seemed to be that the fare was quite tasty. Sides were pretty solid with a Carmichael’s throw back to “tempure-a” onion rings, crazily creamed spinach and a potatoes au gratin which makes a very usual appearance. Solid steak accompaniments in my book and RC and our waiter scored a goal with those ones.
Rick Ray was celebrating his birthday, as was another diner in the restaurant who stopped by to wish him well, but had no offensive language on his t-shirt. Cizzle walked free somehow again as CC roulette was almost botched by one of the guys who was splashing water and not pouring our wine (we did that ourselves) most of the night. A round of coffees later and some debate about putting on some local team jerseys that may or may not have the number 69 on them (Jared Allen), and off the crew went into the Chicago night.
NOTE: Motion was raised to enforce rule that host of steak night has requirement to post recap within a week of steak night occurring, with attendees to post within a week after that period has elapsed. Motion carried by a unanimous vote.
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After one of the more bizarre business meetings I have had in my short but illustrious career ended earlier than expected I had no choice but to head for the bar at Ruth’s Chris. First of all, what does the name even mean. Is it named after the son, Chris, of some Ruth? Steven was quick to chat me up while I waited for the other finest gentlemen in Chicago to arrive. Brad Ray was of course spot on time at 630. Scotty promised a 645 arrival and delivered a 720. Bar service while friendly was slow, we made the most of it.
I ate one third of the lobster. I thought there were two orders coming. There I said it.
The calamari attempted an asian flair much like many others around the city but was flat and relatively bland. The ravioli, while a good concept, was just somewhat doughy and single flavored. The shrimp turned out to be shrimp after all.
My steak of choice was the 16oz ribeye. It came out perfectly medium rare and then proceeded to cook to a medium while sitting on the nuclear butter soaked plate. The first half of it was actually quite good. Steve’s best comment of the night was in relation to the Cowboy Ribeye, “without the bone in there, there is no flavor”. That’s what she said.
The sides were all terrible. Just terrible. The potatoes au gratin looked like someone took the freezer section version and then doused them in co jack cheese and microwaved to a bubbly mess. The creamed spinach was a bowl full of melted cream cheese slop. The onion rings were 4 parts batter and 1 part onion. Ruth needs to talk to her son about these disasters.
The birthday dessert was a hockey puck chocolate cake with a scoop of vanilla ice cream that our waiter Steve had half melted while storing it in his pants.
Cocktails at Siena Tavern followed.
The banter was spirited as always with much conversation over our delinquent friend who shall not be named here. He will get his come comeuppance soon enough. Discussions on a pending bachelor party were plentiful. We even broached the topic of what Rick Ray smells like on a Sunday morning.
Overall I don’t recommend Ruth or her son Chris for a good steak dinner in Chicago.
Spring is nature’s way of saying, “lets party.” Ruth’s Chris wouldn’t know a party if it took a dump on Ruth’s or Chris’ head. I arrived to see Brad and Hans discussing Hans’ new business venture into the divorcee community. I would like to reiterate that I’d like a formal introduction into this community. The rest of the crew, sans Glick obviously, arrived on time and we were well on our way into drinking over-iced brown liquor.
Once seated, wine was ordered by our gracious host Maria Bartilomo and the dining began. I hear the lobster was good but I’ll refer you to Hans’ on that one. I’m pretty sure he secretly got a doggie bag and has the rest in his fridge at home right now. This night will forever be known to me as the “Ravioli Incident.” Apparently modifying a standard order form five to six to accommodate our party is against Sysco’s contract with Ruth and Chris. This restaurant might as well be dead to me right now. Certainly not a way to treat patrons spending $150 a plate.
The sides were below average all around. Nothing special about the shrimp. The creamed cream was too creamy. There might have been a parsley flake in there somewhere.
I ordered the bone-in ribeye as usual. It came out on a plate with a temperature similar to the surface of the sun. I’m sure my beard and eyebrows will grow back some day. It was serviceable but unremarkable for the most part.
It was Uncle Rick’s birthday so a molten chocolate cake was brought in his honor. I think Hans took the ice cream home too.
It was voted unanimously to require the host to post within 7 days of the event, and for everyone else within 7 days after that.
Post dinner festivities carried over to Sienna Tavern. All in all a fine evening, regardless of the lackluster performance by Ruth, Chris, and everyone else working in that joint.
Sir Bill Conway will be doing a shot of the group’s choosing next month for canceling within 24 hours of the event. Sir Don Cole will have some fun waiting for him as well.
I arrived at Ruth Chris about 7:10 to find Cizzle, Hans and Daddy Gimms already half way through their first cocktail. I ordered a Tito’s and soda and joined the party. Scotty Markets joined the group soon after and we immediately began grilling Hans on a time and location for his Bachelor Party. There was talk about Vancouver but still no firm commitment from Zee German on a time and place. I’m willing to bet we will have the same conversation at the May steak night.
We were seated dangerously close to the bathroom, if someone dropped a bomb we would know. Glick joined the table to round out the group for the evening. Unfortunately Mr. Conway was stuck at work and canceled within 24 hours of the dinner. This means rule number 5, unofficially known as “The Green Chartreuse” rule will be in effect in May.
The spicy lobster was good but probably not worth the price but at least I got to try it. Calamari, osso buco ravioli and bbq shrimp were all enjoyable but didn’t blow you away. The thing that stands out the most from the aps was the unwillingness of the restaurant to adjust portions to fit the group. You couldn’t give us 6 ravioli instead of 5 so everyone could get one, terrible customer service and something we have never experienced previously.
I ordered the rib eye and it was just alright. This is partly my fault because I didn’t order the cowboy cut which has the bone in it and is usually my rib eye of choice. For some reason I was confusing the cowboy cut with the tomahawk and Fred Flintstone has never been my guy so the tomahawk is not my cut. My game was a bit off tonight and it didn’t register that a cowboy cut is a bone in rib eye, I blame Barney Rubble for my stupidity. The au gratin potatoes and tempura onion rings were both pretty solid sides. To me the sizzling plate is like the WNBA, apparently some people have a use for it but I don’t understand the appeal and if it went away no one would miss it. The chocolate cake was great. (Dad is great, he gives us chocolate cake).
The service was average, more so the team then the main waiter. I almost died of thirst because the water was filled so inconsistently. However the waiter dropped a Shep Messing reference, as someone who was a huge fan of the NY Arrows and MISL lore in general this gets huge points in my book. If he dropped a Steve Zungul reference I really would have lost it.
Everyone attended post dinner drinks at Sienna, a trend I hope continues as we finally leave winter in the rearview mirror and march towards summer. Good times as always.
A return to the scene of Don’s suspension from steak night, surely he would seek retribution. Or, in typical Don fashion, not communicate with anyone and not show up. This begs the question; will Ruth Chris deliver a knockout blow to Don Cole for a second time? A word on manners in general, steak night rules or no steak night rules, when you are invited to dinner you should respond as to whether or not you can make it. That really falls into the common courtesy bucket.
OK, I am now off my soapbox re: generally acceptable manners.
I am not a Ruth Chris fan, but I figured they could at least pour a proper drink, so I showed up to meet Hans at 6:30 to receive an under poured Oban followed by a second served in a shattered glass. Ole Steverino, our bartender, was off to a blazing start. In his best effort to recover he poured Cizzle’s Oban over a pint glass of ice….a complete whiff on the bar service.
Full crew in tow we were showed to our table. I liken our table to the episode of Family Guy where Tom Tucker gets his private table on the toilet – we were that close. The balance of the night – meal, service, sides, apps, steak etc. was Meh. Not terrible but not really good….just unmemorable.
Of note is Ruth Chris’ approach to the customer experience. Generally a steak house will adjust the size of the app order to make sure everyone at the table gets a piece. Not Ruth Chris….another Whiff. Calamari was OK, ravioli also ok and I didn’t get to try the lobster thanks to Hans’ gluttonous portion size. My steak was cooked well but the flavor, while not bad, was nothing special.
Other items of note….Rick Ray was acting like a steak night virgin with his cuts of meat and an approved vote for the host posting within a week and others commenting within the next week was approved. It was Rick Ray’s birthday and we had a discussion about Shep Messing and the NY Arrows with our waiter. Good showing at Scotties daughters’ tavern for some drinks post dinner.
Despite the lackluster performance of the restaurant – the group was in fine spirits and it was a fun night. Can’t wait for my first steak night with Conway and his consumption of a cement mixer, three wiseman or some other horrible shot.
Crew – Loved every minute of it. Good times all around.
Place – I concur with the meh vibe of the group. It felt, um, weird.
Steak was ok – honestly don’t remember what i got.
Apps – I blame the restaurant for putting 2 apps on one plate, which can easily confuse Hans as to the appropriate size. As for the 8 hot dogs, 6 buns part of the debate, I let that slide.
Desert – No idea. Certainly not Mastro’s butter cake.
Rick wore his fur blazer which was a much welcome surprise. Some would think gold buttons on a fur blazer is an overkill, but Rick can carry it off. I can’t wait to see if he brings out the sequins again in May for his annual Mayday outfit.
Bonus points for the Sienna Trip. Can’t wait till we go to Charlotte.